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Phoenix

Craving intimacy

5 posts in this topic

Every now and then I get this way, especially when I'm not feeling well physically. For like, a good three years I was enjoying being single. I'd previously gone from ages 14 to 27 with maybe a few months total in between serious relationships, so it was new and liberating. I got to make connections with a few different women and move about the country. Lately though, I've been really missing the intimacy. Just the simple things, a hug here, a kiss there, a cuddle if I really needed it. And I do today. Blah.

I'll feel better tomorrow, but it's a firm reminder that I need to get healthy enough to be able to have a relationship again.

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I hate being touched or hugged when I'm feeling low. I feel like I don't deserve it and it makes my skin crawl.

But when the emotions finally break free I just want to be held and loved

I understand the need for touch, it really does heal and I wish I could reach through and give you what you need.

Much love and mental hugs x x

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Huh. I have terrible self-loathing myself but it doesn't extend to that in the same way. Being comforted physically always helps when I'm down. I wonder why that is.

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Would a lucid dream help?  In all seriousness during those times would doing a lucid dream session about holding those you are close to as though they are really there when in life they are not, be helpful?

I have had lucid dreams where I could feel the water fully as I swam.

I have fallen in my dream from the sky to the earth and knew the roar and push of the winds before the touch of the earth.

None of these we're invoked on my part but I know I entered into that state because I was aware of it while in the dream.

This may help especially when physical touches feel more like a burning irritating sensation that is just under your skin so that you can't reach it type of feeling.  Making extremely frustrated, self hate and want to drag your nails over your body as a form of release.

Instead try to invoke your mind's place of rest Be it from real life to imagination and submerge yourself until you can truly feel your very existence in your sanctuary.

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I haven't looked into lucid dreaming in a while. I never had the mental discipline for it. I'm brutally bad at habit forming. I've been meaning to get on a regular meditation schedule for years but never have. It's always been "wake up, you got shit to do" and then I'm at 110% the rest of the day after that in an effort to outpace the pain.

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