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Everything posted by hirondelle

  1. ASMR

    ASMR. / Triggers Does anyone use audio ASMR triggers? I have tried a few but they are mostly weird and vaguely sexual.... wait is it supposed to be sexual? Am I missing the point? I find it interesting but I don't really like it so I feel like I am missing something. I would love to hear other people's experience with it. If you don't know what it is... here is an example:
  2. Ok please be gentle with me. This is the only place I dare post this and it is definitely controversial but I have to express myself or I will go crazy. Before I say anything let me make the following clear: Harvey Weinstein is predator and his behaviour was despicable I feel terrible for any woman who suffered sexual abuse or harassment at the hands of a man. If it was you I am sorry that happened to you and wish we lived in a world where it was unheard of. However I am really struggling with the #metoo hashtag campaign. I can see why it is possibly needed but I wish it was different. Very briefly (there is a lot I can say but I will try to stay focussed) this is why: Some of the worst sexual harassment I have witnessed in my own organisation was a male upper manager harassing a male senior teacher. When the senior teacher complained about it the upper management closed ranks and the senior teacher lost his job through 'restructuring'. (For the record I was his second / witness through the whole process, the Senior Teacher was actually disciplined for being homophobic). I have also heard a case of a female upper manager propositioning a male junior staff member, as well as a male manager propositioning a female staff member. In both cases the junior staff member rebuffed the advances and the story ended. However in the case of the male manager he lost his job in a re-organisation exercise a year later which was ostensibly unrelated. Among the people I know I have known men and women who suffered sexual abuse at the hands of men, the most distressing case I know of personally happened a young boy and was committed by an older boy. In the Hollywood-type abuses cases although I do not blame the victims neither do I blame only the perpetrators. Powerful men have been allowed to evolve in a culture that was co-created by men and women. Blind eyes were turned by just as many Meryl Streeps as Ben Afflecks (despite the butter wouldn't melt in her mouth attitude now). I do not accept the narrative of the patriarchy. When I was a kid I pulled the legs of insects and burned ants with my magnifying glass like a boy. I am capable of taking advantage to someone weaker than me, I bullied people at school (I was also bullied), as a teenager I pursued (unsuccessfully) older married men with far more passion than boys my own age, if I had been a rock star I would have fucked groupies, if I had been a female Harvey I may have asked Ryan Gosling to watch me shower. This trait is not gender based, it is just a streak you have and you learn to control (or not). In summary, cruelty is natural but we do not have to accept it. However we can only fight it is we take joint responsibility of the culture that enabled it. Abuse and harassment happens to men and women, and if the perpetrators are mostly men it is because they have the power - give more power to women and we will abuse it too. The current #metoo campaign is trying to make men monsters and the world is just not that black and white.
  3. HM King Bhumibol Adulyadej

    HM King Bhumibol Adulyadej of Thailand passed away a year ago today. Actually @icewlfwas on his way to visit us and was in the air as the news broke so he landed to find a country deep in mourning. For many people this would ruin their holiday (the people were subdued, the country was working out how to mourn, alcohol and nightlife suddenly became a bit of a hot topic) but as @icewlf is a lover of high Thai culture rather than the low kind I think it enriched his experience, and he felt honoured to be part of a country grieving the loss of their father recognising it for the once in a lifetime experience it was. To say King Bhumibol Adulyadej is revered is almost an understatement. He is considered a god here in Thailand, and although I cannot put my hand on my heart and say any human deserves such reverence - if anyone did it would be him. Views on royalty and privilege aside, he dedicated his life to his people and loved them with every fiber of his being. He also behaved impeccably throughout his life on the throne and was what I would call a modern day Renaissance Man. He has been mourned for a full year. Now exactly a year since his death his final journey begins and that journey will terminate in his public cremation in the heart of Bangkok's Royal district at 10pm on October 26th. I thought I would document these final few days, and collect relevant links in one place, for myself as much as anything. Feel free to comment and ask questions. Here is an old history channel documentary about HM if you are interested in him but have never heard of him. It is dated and very much a superficial introduction but a good place to start.
  4. Lists

    @Timberwolf Goddess: I love you Wolf: I love you too Goddess: I want you Wolf: I want you too Goddess: I need you Wolf: I need you too
  5. Good morning thread

    *come in hair awry, blurry eyed* Good morning everyone. *makes a vast pot of coffee and pours a giant mug* *pops down in a chair and takes a cautious sip of the still too hot beverage * *grins* My word you guys have been busy.
  6. Word association

  7. I'm listening to my aircon... I just wanted to start this thread for a friend
  8. The person above me

    Doesn't exist.
  9. 3 am ramblings

    My mum did that to a large extent, but what she couldn't see and what everyone around her could see is that is was a kind of unwanted martyrdom. Yes, my dad took advantage of it as men of that generation were inclined to do, negligently rather than maliciously... but I think he would have preferred the slightly more selfish version of her. Their marriage would have been more fulfilling for both of them if she hadn't made it so easy for him to take her for granted. I know every story is different but I guess you have to balance what you want to do for your children and how you want to empower them. You have to model independence as well as be there for them. I know you know this. Glad to hear you found a way to find yourself again @Squarepeg also enjoy the photographs that come from your solitary walks and coffees.
  10. Sex robots / dolls

    Interesting article here, about a sex doll on display at an Electronica Arts festival which so badly 'molested' by the men who... ahem... viewed her, that she had to be sent away for repairs. The article goes on to say how "The attack on Samantha is deeply disturbing. It’s a blatant example of the violence that can happen when we tell men they can do whatever they want to an object designed to resemble a woman’s body." It also goes on to assert that the whole point of sex robots is that they eroticise non consent. Full article here - well worth a read. Aside from the obvious question of how much molesting you are able to do in a public convention, or whether not it was horny men who damaged her (there has been some refuting). What also interested me was my interest. I found the implication simultaneously very disturbing and oddly arousing (it was written to elicit only disgust / dismay). Not sure it would be prudent to explain why here... but I would love to know your thoughts on the whole debacle.
  11. You've Heard of Blue Balls...

    Ouchie...poor MC, hopefully the missus will nuzzle them better for you 😉
  12. You've Heard of Blue Balls...

    Oh no, like... bruised?
  13. Reviewed quickly, comments added. Good assignment. Henson-Writing Assignment 1 - TD.docx
  14. Three word story (continuous)

    once upon a...
  15. Welcome..... back

    Welcome home Reddragon! Thank you for coming back *hugs*
  16. Welcome Rioblane!

    *beams* Welcome home @Rioblane, brother of @Kethlia *sweeping bow*
  17. 3 am ramblings

    Sorry you feel this bad. I had a bad turn a few years ago where I was replaying a negative loop. It created quite bad insomnia and in the end I had to go to the docs for some pharmaceutical help. He gave me 10 days worth of Xanax which I managed to make last a month haha. Anyway forget what your kids think, it is easy knowing everything when you are young. Focus on putting yourself first for a while @Tika. Between your job, kids and lover I feel you might be in danger of giving yourself away. Love ya lady... thank you for dreaming of me ❤️
  18. What are you reading at the moment?

    I'm reading 'The Way of the Shaman' by Michael Harner
  19. Day 1, Again

    Weekly check in: 174.6 today despite having eaten All The Wings last night! So that is another 2lbs down. Feeling good! The challenge this week is to keep up the discipline despite being on leave. Not going on holiday anywhere but just being at home with free time will be a big temptation for me. I am going to work very hard to avoid carbs (because that is how things get ugly fast) and try and do some exercise everyday.... plus get my steps! Wish me luck.
  20. Day 1, Again

    So thanks to your inspiration and support, I am trying once again to fix myself. My fat mess of a body and my shitty relationship with food and exercise. This time I am trying low carb. I have dialled in 30/40/30 macros, but today I am way off 11/45/44 and stupidly under on calories - I am not even willing to admit how few calories I had according to MFP.... I just hope the omelette I had for breakfast was actually more than the one I chose in the damn app. I just don't know what else to eat. But I managed to keep the carbs low lmao. Question: Can you suggest protein snacks... aside from boiled eggs which get boring fast. Sorry rambling but today is day 1, again. Starting weight is 180lbs. First target is under 170lbs by Christmas. Should be easy right?
  21. Progress Pictures

    You look amazing @Kenai
  22. Its Baaaaaccckkk!!!

    *huggles @PyroCJ* Yay, you found us at last!!! Thanks you for coming home sweetie!!
  23. ASMR

  24. Pimp your NL blog

    Do you have a blog at the Northlands - promote it here? I have just started a new blog called "Rattlepapanna" - it is an audio blog and I made my first post today. It's a bit long sorry - I will ramble less next time.