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SoulDragon

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About SoulDragon
 
 
  • Birthday 03/29/1982
 
  1. Some of you might have figured something is going on in my health department, and yes, it's kinda complicated so here's the short version (hopefully). I've already been struggling with energy deficiency for many years, somewhere around 10 - 15 years ago it started, and over the years it got worse and worse. Generally they call it fatigue, but i don't agree, it's not simple fatigue, it's much more than that. The everyday things in life cost me much more energy than it would other people, as an example: if i go to the bar an evening with a friend i usually go from 8 pm to 12 pm and am in bed by 1 am, i don't drink alcohol anymore these days because of meds ~grumbels~, it will cost me 2-3 days to recover from it, longer if i couldn't resist drinking 1 beer. If i don't get the chance to recover or ignore the fatigue and am my stubborn self my body will retaliate and knock me down completely with a few days making me feel like i have the flue. So that's the problem in short. I've been to my general practitioner (is that correct for the regular doctor?) a few times over the years, but i didn't get any further than a bloodtest and her telling me i was perfectly healthy. In the end i gave up because i didn't have the energy left to deal with that and i focused on fighting to get true every day and get everything done that i should/wanted. You can guess that in the end that ended in a huge depression (which my friends on facebook can't have missed...). I finally changed my regular doctor and one thing let to another and i finally got to that one to send me to a specialist in the hospital who at the first meeting told me "No matter what we'll have to do, no matter how long in'll take, we'll figure out what it is", it was the best thing i had heard in a loooong time. But meanwhile things happened and i wasn't able to fight the fatigue anymore suddenly and i ended up long term sick at home and wasn't able to work even my part-time hours anymore, this all happened about 3 months ago. ....so far for short... I'm not sure if you are familiar with this or understand what i'm talking about, but here's the thing; Here every employee has "health benefits" that means that when you get sick your employer will keep paying you (most of) your pay. But that of course means you also have obligations as a sick person to your employer. We have company doctors who's job it is to get you back to work as soon as possible, and there's nothing wrong with that you would say, problem is those company doctors get paid by the company and are on their side of course, and they are less/different educated than the general practitioner. But they do have a big say in what you should do to get back to work and if you don't cooperate the employer is allowed to stop paying you. Now i'm at the stage where the specialist is still figuring out what disease i have, i get tested and than have to wait for result to do the next examination, although there is one big contestant which is chronic fatigue syndrome/ME, but they can only say you have than when all other possibilities are ruled out. Now my company doctor is already convinced i have cfs and already had some therapies in mind she could "send me to" when they finally say i indeed have it, at first i didn't think much of it, it sounded pretty good what she told about it. But I assume that when they indeed say i have that the specialist will probably refer me to a doctor who is specialized in that disease. Now my problem is; i get to be treated by 2 completely separate doctors??? If one says i have to get therapy here and the other wants me to go there i have to do 2 therapy's? What if one says to try out this medicine that might help lessen the symptoms and the other says i need to try out those other medicine??? I tried looking it up on who has highest say in this situation, but every article says different things, and mainly it's not favorable to me and they say i have to listen to the company doctor who hardly knows anything about the disease and how to treat it... Now probably if it's a good doctor she would just follow the specialist....but those company doctors have some extraordinary ideas sometimes...so this makes me very worried about my treatment.. (and if there is one thing fatal for my health it is worrying about things) For now i can only wait and see, and hope for the best i guess... Sorry it has gotten such long story after all .
  2. Happy Birthday Rioblane

    Happy Birthday!!!
  3. .... he's getting married!!! It is about time (he's 41), and i did wish he would find a nice girl that would make him happy and would take care of him... So i'm happy my wish has been heard, but why does it hurt so much? It's not official yet, but he did give a huge warning by saying "I hope to get married soon....soon i have some good news." Why are my guys all slowly getting married (last summer also the first of the 6 boy-band members)? They are my lifeline that it isn't hopeless when you're single at my age... (Seriously though, Korean life standards are starting to brainwash me...i used to not care about marriage and a woman having to take care of her man...weird)
  4. Fanfics

    So, i've writen a few fanfics and i think some people where interested here. They're all about my favourite korean boyband Shinhwa, so the caracters probably won't mean much to you...but that doesn't really matter much i think. Warning: they are all horribly fluffy and romantic, but except for one no almost 18+ or boyxboy. Descriptions are there when you click the link, if you're interested. "The weird fan" is my first and longest fanfic i wrote: https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1055152/the-weird-fan-romance-shinhwa-you-junjin-foreigner-shinhwaandyou-shinhwachangjo These are a few short story's/one shots "P.s. I love you": https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1110330/p-s-i-love-you-ericmun-shinhwa-you-foreigner-shinhwaandyou-shinhwachangjo Got the best comment ever : "I love this so much, could be a small screen act of romantic actor Mun" "Dragon": https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1077386/dragon-shinhwa-you-junjin My bias has a dragon tattoo (found out after i started to like him btw) and i actually have a necklace that's almost the same "Soulmate": https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1164985/soulmate-romance-shinhwa-hyesung-shinhyesung-shinhwachangjo-shinhwaandshcj ...probably the worst one i guess... And then there is this one...kinda embarrassing, but after seeing there are people who might like it i decided to share anyway. This one is almost 18+ and boy x boy, i wrote it because many fans like this kind of story, and i wanted to try once but it's indeed not my cup-of-tea to write ;). It is also a multi chaptered story: https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1064249/the-bodyguard-from-america-ericmun-shinhwa-junjin-ricjin So... yeah... if you want to read feel free, and let me know what you think of it. I have been working on another one evolving around the tv show "Runningman", but unfortunately it;'s been a year since i got the first part finished, and then things happened with me, and the tv show and then i didn't have any inspiration anymore/writers block...and now i wish i could continue again, but just...guess still writers block or something. I do think it was/would be a good story...
  5. Fanfiction?

    Someone mention fanfics???? Lately haven't read much, but i did read allot a while back, i also wrote a few (still planning to share the link in the writers forum). Although you won't know my subjects probably, i read all kind of fanfics about my boyband Shinhwa. I must say, allot of people think that fanfics equal 18+ but there are also many wonderful other kinds of story's, not only romance but i also read some awesome fantasy story's. But like @hirondellekinda mentioned, 6 guys do call for allot of 18+ stuff...without other characters joining in
  6. Been gone for a couple of days...almost a week i see now...but i'm back now. And immediately the forum messes up my plans...i needed to go grocery shopping...well, tomorrow is another day ;)

  7. Age, if you want to share.

    Hihi, almost felt like doing the same No, i've been using make up now since one year or something. In comparison to some of my colleague's only a little bit, but compared to other people around me i'm kinda the only one using make-up. I kinda like it, somehow indeed makes me feel more confident, and i would want to look nice for my future boyfriend, may i happen to bump into him on the street ;). It's kinda like if you're wearing your baggy clothes or not when going outside now. Although originally i didn't feel like this either all true my teens and twenty's....imagine having to figure out how to use make-up when your over 30 , luckily i had a very understanding and experienced colleague who i could ask a bit hihihi
  8. Member Map

    Oohh i love this hihi!
  9. Thanks for sharing @fantasymom, i like it
  10. Wwaaahhh ~pounces and huggles @Kenai~ (Sorry for my late reply, i was gone for a couple of days...i just see this now) First of, you're SO lucky your husband is understanding, that's really awesome! I understand you just found out there's a name for not liking sex? It took me years, and allot of weird thoughts before i found out...i really thought i was probably the only one in the world, or maybe 1 other person somewhere on this huge globe that felt like this. I'm the same as you, i also love being hugged and kissed (it's been too long ) and cuddling, just not the sex that usually comes after it. I also don't think it matters to me if it's a male or female, although i lean a bit more towards the males. I found out a couple of years ago, and was pretty active on the AVEN forums. You know them? It's THE international community for asexuals (forums per country as well), if you haven't been there you should check it out, tons of information and like minded people. There's also room for partners and other interested people. True there i've actually been in a (pretty well known) female magazine here with my story hihi. There are allot of types in the asexuality, like you said there are romantic and a-romantic's within the romantics they further downsized it to gay and bi-, and then there are grey-asexuals they only like sex with THAT particular person, what i understand it's kinda like only with your soulmate. Then there are people who are able/willing to have sex for their partner and just don't care for it, and people who are almost get sick with the thought of having sex...and everything in between , so many different shades of purple Well, if you wanna talk or share thought about it, i'm all for it. @TimberwolfI totally get the hair thing (my best friend has the same thing), i have it when someone is stroking my back...doesn't matter who does it; i'm just in heaven @hirondelleIt's a difficult situation for everyone, i would love to hear more of what it was like from the other side if you want to share. I was in a relationship back then also, although i don't think it was because of the asexuality that we broke up but because i/we didn't love eachother anymore. I do feel like if i would be in a relationship with a sexual person, and i did kinda back then as well, that i feel bad for not being able to meet their needs and give them what they want. (do i say it correct like this?)
  11. 42

    Haha awesome, i knew it was 42, but not why it was 42.
  12. Hello Loves

    Welcome back @Forest Mage, good to see you again! ~huggles tightly~ Damn that was confusing first thing in the morning
  13. iTS me, NOT YOU :)

    Welcome back Deano...i'm not sure if i remember your name.
  14. Card exchange

    Hihi, if you want me to i will. LOL, i'm not worried about that, i have a big dog that will cuddle you to dead
  15. Pretty icon

    oohh sure, no prob, nothing weird in
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