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I am making this thread for @Aliea but other people might appreciate it to. It kind of reads like an RP - but it definitely belongs in the MH area, because it is a place to 'relax and be' without interaction. You can use the pods to sleep, rest, read etc but there is to be no talking in this thread so you can't disturb the sleepers. However if someone comes in here feeling pain, and expressing emotions you may very discretely offer support. Please don't talk to them - you will have to be creative which is why it is like an RP. Things you can do are sit near the pod, lean against it, touch the pod lightly to show support, Do not feel you need to respond though... people come here with the desire to be quiet and relax. You can just read their post and hit the like / love button. Sleepers, try and visualise an environment like the one in the picture. There are variations,,, maybe you want gently moving stars, or complete darkness, maybe you would like soft music, the sound of the sea or a waterfall, maybe a gentle rain. Or maybe you prefer silence. Maybe you would like your pod to rock as if it is a cradle or floating on an ocean with a soft breeze... or maybe you want stillness. It is all dependent on your mood. I am sure you will come up with other things to soothe your spirit. What is important regardless of the variations you choose is that while you are in the pod you feel wrapped in Northlands love. Feel free to post your feelings while you are in the pod and don't be afraid to make consecutive posts, but please be okay with low key or zero responses. We love you very much and this is a place to be still and self soothe. Final note. No jerking off in my pods okay? ;-)
For the longest time I have had to the urge to write. Or at the very least, express my feelings about stuff going on in my life. This has been very hard over the past year due to some major changes in my life as well some major changes beyond my control. For those that do not know, I live with a condition called bipolar. I'm in a federally funded government program that provides housing for people like me with mental illness and I have been in the program since 2009. Since I have been in the program I have done very well and have gotten a better grapple on my illness. I am able to manage my symptoms more effectively and control my anger better than before. However, there is still some work to be done. Over the past year, a lot of good things have happened. Our complex got bought out so we were forced to move to another location, which is in a much nicer area. I also finally have landed two really decent room mates who are not that crazy and have some sort of geek card,which is a blessing. For years I had terrible room mates I dreaded and this community has served as a refuge for me for many years, regardless of the boards being up or down. The good news is there is light at the end of the tunnel. In the spring I will be graduating from American InterContinental University Online with a BS in IT. I have no idea what I want to do with it yet, but with that degree I will finally be able to get a real job and afford a better place for me and my room mates. Also, in the spring we are moving out to a building across the way our landlord bought along with the buildings he did when we moved. The catch is we have to do our chores regularly to a tee because our staff wants to write us a good letter of recommendation. Carrot over our heads. The reality is, with a degree I'll be able to get a better job and hopefully a better place for us. That's the good news. The bad news is pretty shitty for me. The program I'm in is through the county's health department and DuPage is up there with the richest, so it does indeed provide good mental health services. However, since I moved here in December, they switched over to a new system around the time Trump took office. I'll remind you we are a federally funded program so Bruce Rauner's BS didn't affect us. But they have refused to let me see a therapist until I go to a group at these certain locations. More importantly, they want me to work on something short term and specific with the therapist. Well I'm being specific by writing this blog and I need an outlet to express my emotions. Holding them in is not healthy for me. I am doing fine, yes, and there is no need to worry, but this is the longest period in my life I have gone without seeing a therapist. I do have a case worker that manages my case, but she is not licensed. She does help me with my diabetes which I currently struggling with, but as far as i can tell the best excuse I have gotten from management is "There is a lot of changes with funding and the government now." And for fuck's sake, I do hate Trump, but this is beyond political. I'm stable and being denied service. Think of all the others who need the service more desperately that are being denied. For the county to deny service like this is a big deal. My housing is secure, which is good, but I cannot say the same for others. That is why I glad I will be out of the situation I have been in soon. The most frustrating thing is I do not have anyone to relate to. I'm the only one in two buildings that has any hope at getting a decent job. I say this as I am the only one who goes to school and plans to get OFF social security checks. When you live on the fixed income we do, you are not allowed to earn over a certain amount (usually $2000/month). So you're stuck in a clusterfuck. When you live in a community where goals are not set too high, it's tough. That's why I would like to talk to normal or other people outside of my little bubble. Brain cells are wasting away. I'm the smart guy for reading and knowing what logic is.
I wanted to share this with you all and I think this is the most appropriate place to do so. I decided, after a lot of deliberation and thinking, to start blogging, specifically about my mental health and creative journey. I lost my dad last year, really suddenly. It has obviously sparked a lot of emotions and struggles, and I decided to go to regular counselling, which I continue to this day. I have always had a lot of emotions that can sometimes overwhelm me, and counselling has helped me to accept them, and ultimately accept me. I also happen to want to be more creative and find my fears overwhelm that (I've discovered I'm a very scared person). So my blog is my way of publicly writing about my thoughts on the world, tracking my journey to being more creative and overcoming my fears. I decided to publicly announce it on my Facebook account to all my friends and family, including the fact that I go to counselling every week. I have a real issue with the stigma attached to mental health and combat it in any way I can. This is one of my ways. It has allowed me to write about my Dad, in a constructive way. So, I'd love to share it with you all It isn't the most regular thing and not the best blog in the world at the moment, but it is mine and I like having a productive way of getting thoughts and emotions out of me and into the tangible world. And I realised it wasn't as scary to talk about things as I'd thought. Here you go: https://forthineownselfcreate.wordpress.com/