Well, the past few days have kind of been hard couple of days. It all started on Saturday.


Something happened while I was at work, and I had such a strong desire, want, need, craving for a smoke! I almost walked out of work, walked down to the local 7-11 and bought a pack. It was so strong, I couldn't believe it. I'd yet to be hit so hard with such a craving for a smoke since we've quit. It was rough. But I didn't go out and buy any cigarettes. I grit my teeth and worked through it, but damn it was hard on Saturday!


Sunday...? Well, Sunday was fine, lol. I didn't have any issues on Sunday and didn't have any cravings for a smoke, so I thought I was safe. And to make things even nicer, lol, @hirondelle and I went for our weekly foot massage. OMG! If you haven't had a foot massage by somebody who is really good at them, you have just got to try and find yourself some place that does them! Freaking hell! We get them once a week and they just wash away the weeks stress and worries. And they usually knock me out for about 30 minutes for the hour that we get them. They are awesome!


Then Monday hit. Monday wasn't too bad. But for some reason, I was just having minor cravings for a smoke. I don't know why, but time to time throughout the day, I just kind of wanted a smoke. But don't worry sports fans; I didn't have one on Monday. They weren't that bad.


Tuesday and damn did Tuesday freaking hit! I was at work, and having a good day, getting a lot of work done on the curriculum they are having me re-write. I originally wrote the curriculum for the kid's classes with one course book covering 100 hours, which gives myself and my fellow teachers plenty of time to get through the course book, prepare the kids for up and coming tests, for the teachers to work with the kids doing portfolios and the like. Well, my bosses felt that it would be better if we went through two course books in 100 hours. Now this cuts down a lot on what the teachers can do, they just have to quickly teach the book, which is OK, but it doesn't really give the teacher a lot of time to really focus on what the students need other than making sure the know enough to move on to the next section of the book. Then after running this curriculum as they wanted it for about 6 months, they decided to change their mind and go back to what I had said they should do, which was run one course book over 100 hours, and they also want to introduce story time for the little, little kids, and reading time for the older kids, which I think is a great idea. Also, before the end of the year, I wrote the curriculum for a camp that we were running for the beginning of the year, which I'm sure you will remember, Around The World In 10 Days. It was a great camp, and I had a lot of fun, and I taught the majority of the classes for the two weeks that it was running. After I was about 75% done with the curriculum, they decided that what I had done was to mature for the kids, so I had to pare down what I had and get a lot of other activities and put a lot of different things together, so it took me a lot long than it should have to write this curriculum, and now is where the problems start. I got my pay here yesterday, Tuesday, and one of my bosses, Dang, said that I don't get paid for curriculum work (1) because I taught the class and (2) because I was claiming too many hours for writing it. Talk about setting me over the edge. I kept my cool, but damn did I really want a cigarette after that. They still haven't paid me for this time, but we were supposed to have a meeting about it on Thursday, because I normally teach on Monday and Wednesdays.


Now it's Wednesday, and I was supposed to go to a class about 2 hours out from center Bangkok so I didn't have to go into the office, but the class canceled today, so I went into the office. I went into the office at 12 like I do when I'm not teaching. And the owner of the company didn't come in until about 30 minutes before I left, and she didn't even come in and say hi to me or anything. And my other boss, Dang, didn't even come in today. So we didn't have the meeting today about it. And the owner told me that she couldn't have the meeting tomorrow because she is busy, but we can have the meeting on Friday. This is fine by me. Last night, Tuesday, I made a decision, and this morning when I woke up, I felt so much better about things.


No matter what they decide, I come out for the better. See, when we moved back to Bangkok, I really wanted to work for this company, because they were always good to me when I worked for them before. I knew I would probably be making less then I could probably earn, but working for a good company it's sometimes worth it. So the decision that I made, with @hirondelle's support, is simply this. They can give me a pay raise and I won't add any curriculum work or placement testing or any non-teaching work to my pay claim, and if I work more than 70 hours in a month, they will pay me the regular teaching hour pay for anything over those 70 hours. Or, I can go back to being a part time teacher, and not worry about any curriculum or anything like that, and they can just pay me by the hour for my teaching, and I can look around at other schools and get my own private students and make more in the end. So I'm not too worried.


And the good news is a two parter, lol.


Over this whole time and no matter how much I wanted a cigarette, I didn't have one, which makes me feel good.  I didn't have any cravings at all today!


Oh, and when I was in today, I finished the Starter, Movers, Flyers curriculum that they asked for, and only worked on it for about 15 hours total, which should make them happy, lol. And, I was a nice guy and emailed it to them, so they have it no matter what decision they make on Friday.


Thanks for listening to me ramble along.


Always Remember:  If you always follow what your heart says, you can never go down the wrong path.