Christmas, a day of religious to some.

To others is about gifts and family get togethers.

To the world it is another day of beliefs from a different viewpoint, mindset and dogma.

I wonder how my hubby and I will pass the day, work, play, ignorance is bliss?

I what I raised as, what my hubby believes, what another family holiday without our sons means.

For now, I am okay.  He is okay.  We are okay.

However, it will remind us yet again of our loss.

The only comfort if we care to take comfort in it, is the thought that at least our boys aren't suffering.

They're out there causing mischief and mayhem like their mother with the innocence of their father's good nature.

Novas, worm holes, creating nebulas and scattering meteoroid fields.  Who knows maybe even looking up proverbial skirts, togas, etc.

They are my sons after all, heh heh.

I hope the winter falls softly and without bite for my northern NL family.

May those in the tropical climes enjoy star filled nights and temperate weather.

I close my eyes and draw a breath in, a breath of cool crisp air.

A chill that runs across my body and raises goosebumps over my flesh.

A brilliant white sun over white snow.

The crunch of my steps as I shift in the cold.

The sway hiss of pine needles whose scent fills the lightest breeze.

The crackle and rustle of twigs on the ground and on the barren trees.

A cloud that passes in front of the sun, muting its glorious rays to a soft cream.

Clothed in warm clothes and breathing out a warm cloud of breath into the air.

This stillness calms me, settles my feelings, and releases the negativities into the arms of winter.

I hold the vision of your opalescent souls within my mind, my heart, and my soul.  Beloved Sons of ours.  We love you.  We miss you being in our lives.  The days are dull even as we do our best to live.  We smile, we laugh and we play pranks on each other.  Yet, in the stillness of our minds away from society and life's continual stroll, we miss you, our babies.  The sanctuary of our hearts is each other especially in our grieving.  We hope for another day to grow stronger and precious moments that give life its true meaning.  Dearest lights within the sky of our souls guide us to where our sons await our reunion with patience and ready eagerness to hear the stories of our adventure called Life.  We await our reunion and keep stepping forward into new and old horizons.  Just bear with us when we have let our tears of saddness fall.  Missing you and not having you here physically takes a toll on us more than can be 'suck it up' or 'give it time' its a welcome release of our true loving feelings that have no where to go. We love you. We miss you.  We'll be with you when our life ends naturally.  It will just be a long, narrow, rocky stumbling road is all. One step at a time and we'll get to our next moment of bracing strength.