Positive habit forming

[Phoenix]

I am brutally bad at positive habit forming. I've been trying for years to get into regular meditation, but I never do string sessions together. I've been advised that difficulty forming good habits or maintaining them is common for depressives, and I've been given some tips, such as tying the sessions to an existing habit or starting slow, like twice a week, and ramping up.

There's a couple of new-ish habits I've been able to maintain lately, such as my Japanese study and beard care, but not my meditation and, to a lesser extent, regular exercise. I have to figure out how to get this nailed down.

 

[hirondelle]

I understand your frustration, because I have a similar problem but maybe a little more control over it (possibly because I am not clinically depressed?).  I feel like I completely understand it now.  I read The Power of Habit paid the subscription to be part of Leo Babauta's Sea Change programme for 4 months (I only needed this long to learn the process so then I quit because I could direct it to follow my own agenda rather than follow his).  Now although I sometimes screw up trying to create or maintain a habit I know where I went wrong and why.  Basically you just have to own it (back to Jocko haha).  

https://seachange.zenhabits.net/

https://www.amazon.com/Power-Habit-What-Life-Business/dp/081298160X 

One thing I think you have to be careful of is trying to control too much.  Prioritise according to what will have the biggest payoff (in quality) in your life.

[Phoenix]

Indeed, not controlling too much. I suppose if one were to look at habit forming as a renewable internal resource, I've done pretty well this year and possibly depleted that reserve a bit by removing some negative habits. My binge eating is way down, and I'm pretty solidly hitting my calorie targets. Rolled into all that is actually making and eating meals three times a day--I used to just eat when I got hungry. There's a lot there.

I've often thought maybe I don't "want it" enough with meditation. It's experimental for me and the benefits are by no means immediate. It's part of discipline, which, well, has always been lax. I also just don't need another tool like I did before. My depression is far more under control than it used to be. I kind of roll with the flow now, whereas it used to completely take over.

Edited October 14, 2017 by Phoenix

[hirondelle]

11 minutes ago, Phoenix said:

Indeed, not controlling too much. I suppose if one were to look at habit forming as a renewable internal resource, I've done pretty well this year and possibly depleted that reserve a bit by removing some negative habits. My binge eating is way down, and I'm pretty solidly hitting my calorie targets. Rolled into all that is actually making and eating meals three times a day--I used to just eat when I got hungry. There's a lot there.

I've often thought maybe I don't "want it" enough with meditation. It's experimental for me and the benefits are by no means immediate. It's part of discipline, which, well, has always been lax. I also just don't need another tool like I did before. My depression is far more under control than it used to be. I kind of roll with the flow now, whereas it used to completely take over.

Sounds like you are doing brilliantly @Phoenix. Yeah don't try and rush this process because you have to continually monitor yourself for complacency. One habit has to be either extremely rewarding or firmly grounded before you can split your attention and pick up another.

That said the benefits of meditation are like secrets superpowers so don't write it off completely. If now isn't the right time do pencil it in for the future.