Coronavirus blues

[hirondelle]

I don't know about you all but when I am afraid or sad I come here, just to look around and see if there is anything to cheer me up and distract me, or maybe someone around to share my fears and / or tell me everything will be ok. It makes me sad that The Northlands isn't the sanctuary it used to be, but that is just because we got busy and grown up and the internet got noisy. 

But anyway, I wanted to make the post I secretly came here hoping to read... to reassure you The Spirit of the Northlands is still going strong. We are all here, holding hands in the digital dark - caring for each other - and WyldFyre and Ogre are looking out for us from another realm. 

And I am here, your Goddess waiting for you to creep home for a hug.  I see you Northlanders... parents afraid for your kids, I see you kids afraid for your parents.  Me? I'm afraid for my mum, my pets (if Dom and I got quarantined) and a little for myself because I am not ready to die yet despite having thought about ending it more than once in recent years.  Nothing like an external threat to put things in perspective. 

Most of all I am afraid of losing Dom my most darling wolf - and we have been through some shit recently and I pondered leaving, or at least taking an extended break... but again, I didn't want to lose him, I just wanted him back.

So if you pop in looking for some comfort, please leave a post here.  Whether you think it is armageddon or a media conspiracy, let's hang together a while - like old times.

Love you all, and miss you something fierce. Hirondelle

 

[Timberwolf]

[Deano]

Here in London, things are getting a little serious. in my area there are many confirmed cases and throughout the UK there a thousands. I trust wolves friends and family members are well.

[hirondelle]

We are okay so far in Thailand. They are talking about closing more things down. Schools, entertainment venues etc. I think @fox  is having a 14-day self-quarantine moment having travelled recently. Maybe I can lure her here to explain. 

[fox]

Indeedy!

I was slated to go to South Carolina (SC) for a very good friend's wedding - I'd been planning to attend for over a year. I'd be lying if I said I didn't almost cancel a few days before. We'll get to the mental effects of that in a moment or two.

So I left last Wednesday - great, smooth trip. Great hugs. Great late night sushi dinner. It was going outstandingly. Then Thursday happened. It was a lovely morning, fun pre-wedding US Costco shopping trip (which was lined up to the back of the store as I expect things looked in The Walking Dead before shit got really real). Then news started to trickle in and my anxiety started to tighten my shoulders. Trump started flapping gum, then Canada reacted. I had a fun night Thursday, alternating between friendly visiting and sobbing - I cried myself to sleep that night, tbh. So. I chatted with my mom Friday morning and when I came out of that conversation in tears, my beautiful bride friend asked if I needed to go to the airport. It was the "permission" I needed - I booked a last minute flight and had another smooth travel day (well, with a 10h stay in the Vancouver airport overnight, but I was back in BC and I knew I could handle anything as long as I was back in BC).

So. I'm home. Because I crossed boarders, I'm meant to self-quarantine for 14-days. I am newly, differently thankful that I am separated (almost divorced actually, which is a different story for a different thread and day) from my ex and our children are with him. He is a wonderful, devoted father and they are fine. But. I don't get to see my boys until almost April, now. And I fucking KNEW that I shouldn't leave. I'm trying not to beat myself up, because I actually didn't/couldn't have known. Things ramped alarmingly after I was already in the US. When I left, there was no travel warning in place, and no warnings to quarantine, or even socially distance. It was business as usual, but wash your hands and don't like doorknobs. All the same, I'm beating myself up. This is a safe space, and I don't need coddling - I know my bran is inclined to get into Depression Mode pretty quickly and I have some rational thoughts helping right now - but FUCK do I feel selfish and like a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad momma.

I'm trying to keep busy. I'll be working from home for at least the next two weeks, and when I don't have emails to reply to, I'll be organizing and cleaning my house, working on a budget project, baking (I stress bake), and walking the mutt as often as I can (no gym time for this fox - send me your best workout videos please and tyvm).

I chuckled at the ogre comment, btw. My first in line is looking out for me in a strange, beautiful way. It's amusing. I love him.

And hey? I fucking love you, @hirondelle. You will always be so important to me. However life ebbs and flows, you are always my person.

Ugh. I fucking hate this. It's bullshit. I'm also worried about people. I'm self-quarantining because I cannot be the cause of my children getting sick - I would rather not see them for this whole awful ride than risk that no matter how healthy and strong all of our bodies are. (Please note: I do not have symptoms. I just interacted with too many people in an international sense and Canada, BC in particular, asks that I solo a few weeks.) I hate seeing the news of deaths. I know that immunocompromised people are massively susceptible right now. Those are people, though. They're individuals with rich histories and people who love them. And they're dying. From this bullshit flu. This isn't the way this should be going. And people are getting manic. Manic people are stocking up on firearms and ammunition (and tp, yeah yeah). I'm worried that COVID-19 is only one concern during this time.  

People we know will get sick. People we know may die from this. 

And then there are social implications. On an academic level, the studies in the next 6-24 months will be fucking fascinating. Living it may be dicey, though.

Bah. Thank you for this thread, and this place. I know it's quiet here, but I check it often, too. I don't always post, because I don't always have a lot to say. But I will always love it.

[hirondelle]

Thank you for sharing @fox.  Being away from your babies must be tough but you know they are in good hands. I am sure there was an element of not wanting to contribute to the panic that informed your decision to travel, I know I am constantly weighing that kind of choice.  Even the decision to buy some groceries made me feel guilty, and I had rationalise it by explaining to myself that I am just buying what normal people have anyway - I am not panicking or hoarding or being selfish.  I am simply acknowledging that I may not be able to rely on food delivery and restaurants being as smooth and conveniently at hand for a few weeks, and it isn't selfish to stock up with SOME provisions.  I have gone from a zero pasta owner to a 2 bags of pasta owner.  It doesn't make me a crazy prepper.

 

[Clarissa]

Big hugs to you all. It's a very scary and uncertain time for us all. It's been crazy here for awhile, bushfires,  then floods and now this. 

Edited March 18, 2020 by Clarissa

[icewlf]

I'm going insane after just 3 days of mandatory telework.  I'm very introverted, but have had a lack of meaningful social contact for so long, than now....i NEEEEEED contact.....physical contact, and I'm not allowed to have it for the forseable future    Plus, no pretty women smile at me when i'm at home.   Gonna be a rough month or two =P

 

[fox]

2 hours ago, icewlf said:

I'm going insane after just 3 days of mandatory telework.  I'm very introverted, but have had a lack of meaningful social contact for so long, than now....i NEEEEEED contact.....physical contact, and I'm not allowed to have it for the forseable future    Plus, no pretty women smile at me when i'm at home.   Gonna be a rough month or two =P

 

I didn't actually quite understand how important physical contact is to me until very recently. Last was last Friday morning, a hug from a friend when I left S Carolina to come back home. I can't hug and cuddle my kids, and I can't hug and cuddle a pretty amazing gentleman I was really enjoying hugging and cuddling. I get why and I can be okay with it because of that, but FUCK is it starting to get fucking grating. And it won't end until next Friday night/Saturday morning. So. At least the dog's in it with me.

[icewlf]

54 minutes ago, fox said:

I didn't actually quite understand how important physical contact is to me until very recently. Last was last Friday morning, a hug from a friend when I left S Carolina to come back home. I can't hug and cuddle my kids, and I can't hug and cuddle a pretty amazing gentleman I was really enjoying hugging and cuddling. I get why and I can be okay with it because of that, but FUCK is it starting to get fucking grating. And it won't end until next Friday night/Saturday morning. So. At least the dog's in it with me.

yeah, for me, they're telling us to plan on having to telework for 6-12 weeks.  I'm not sure my psyche can handle that.  Might be different if I lived alone, but 2-3 months of my parents nonstop with teleworking isnt going to be good for me.  Especially if they keep watching the hallmark channel.  Its been nothing but crappy romance movies every day since thanksgiving.   I've only been home 3 days and I'm already starting to lose it =P

[hirondelle]

@icewlf that sounds tough! I guess I am lucky, I have been working from home on and off for ages and I just have Dom and the animals who are very cooperative and good and not distracting me when necessary.  My recent discovery of a really good quality noise cancelling headset has helped a lot with meetings though.  A must have I now realise. 

I am not sure about physical contact to be honest.  I like a hug when I am feeling down, but just from Dom.  I am happy not touching friends lol. What can I say, I was made for social distancing.  I seem to be able to get all the social connection I need from this kind of thing... sharing texts with you guys.  I am the social equivalent of an air plant or something. 

@fox you know I want details about this gentleman.

[Forest Mage]

This just added more to the living hell I've been going through.   I lost enough family already,  I don't need to lose more cause of the damn virus.   I keep praying my heart out that my family keeps staying healthy during this time.     

 

Sending healthy vibes and prays to all of my Northlands family. 

[hirondelle]

1 hour ago, Forest Mage said:

This just added more to the living hell I've been going through.   I lost enough family already,  I don't need to lose more cause of the damn virus.   I keep praying my heart out that my family keeps staying healthy during this time.     

 

Sending healthy vibes and prays to all of my Northlands family. 

Oh honey I am sorry you are going through it - I know you lost your uncle end of last year.  Who else passed away?  I am sorry if I missed a post.  Love and strength FM.

[Tika]

I forgot until I got here how much I miss this place when I don't come around.

We're doing ok here, I'm on the opposite end of the work from home scale.   We haven't had any cases in the town I live in yet but it's coming and probably soon and the small hospital I work at could easily get overwhelmed.  My town is mostly shut down, no schools, no restaurants or bars open, most businesses closed, limited hours at grocery stores etc.  I'm isolating as much as I can but the odds of me getting exposed at work are pretty high no matter how careful I am.

[Forest Mage]

1 hour ago, hirondelle said:

Oh honey I am sorry you are going through it - I know you lost your uncle end of last year.  Who else passed away?  I am sorry if I missed a post.  Love and strength FM.

No one  else  has  passed  away.  But I  did have  a  cousin  with  a  fungal  infection  in his lungs, and  my mom came  down  with  a  mild case of  bell's palsy.   Both  are  doing  well  now.

I  just  don't  want  anyone  else  getting  sick  and  I  worry  for  my family  cause  some  do have  health  issues.

[Moonhawk]

Checking in, having the kids out of school  has helped with time with them. My agoraphobia and anxiety rear their heads more frequently since the outbreak, however still going to work. Having your own business and employees who depend on you is hard. My Filipino teams is on lockdown so most are working from home. However not the same for my Miami team yet. I fear the worse is yet to come after speaking to two friends who work in government. Hope all are safe

[SoulDragon]

Hey, i totally forgot about this place (again), so sorry. ~huggles for everybody~ Hope you and your loved ones stay well 

For me personally nothing's much different, i'm always home sick thanks to my chronic desease, i am being extra careful when i have to go out to the store because of my bad immunesystem. The whole social distancing is definitely my cup of tea, finally a socially excepted reason to avoid as many people as possible . My mom keeps comming for our weekly chit chat and that's enough for me, you can't keep us appart no matter what, if i tell her i'm sick she still comes if i'm up to it and the other way around as well.

I was extra sick the last 2 weeks or so, if it was Covid or just a bad flu....who knows, i'm recovering from it with plenty of rest as always. I did get worried when my mom got sick last week, but it's only mildly sick and mostly anoying coughing.

The worst part for me is all those people hoarding, the grocery delivery service is fully booked a week ahead, while normally i order and get it delivered the next day. But no shortages there, yet, only in the grocery stores...no toilet paper...which i really don't get, it's not like you get diarrhea from covid?!  
(seriously, can anyone explain to me why that's the first thing that gets hoarded?)

So far the covid update on my part, i got plenty of other stuff to tell, but that's for another topic.

[Dulcet]

This has long been my favorite place to check in. I only wish it were under better circumstances. All good things have been happening lately. I moved closer to the city of Chicago and am hopefully in a better environment. EVERYTHING is is right at my corner including a Walmart, Gamestop, and an ALDI. I'm pretty well stocked up on. food and toilet paper luckily. I'll see how stores are next week. I'm fien and don't have any symptoms, but our building is doing a self-quarantine thing I guess. There's staff here and staff cannily communicate with us by phone now until further notice. And all groups have been canceled. No visitors are allowed either. I'm thinking this also means our mail isn being held because I haven't gotten any mail in the last few days since the policy took effect. I'm doing fien though Having lived in DuPage county my entire life, adjusting to Cook County has been rough. I won't be able to see a psychiatrist for a few more weeks which sucks, Services over all are more limited here, despite it being closer to the city. I've been living off gas station food because I'm too lazy. McDonald's and Burger King were my go to spots when I first moved here, but I don't have a car to use the drive  thru. 

I have been getting out and getting exercise everyday. I walk a lot. There's a blind guy downstairs that asks me to take him places like the gas station and the blood bank across the street so it feels kinda nice to be needed by someone. My neighbors are nice and under regularly scheduled weeks we have game nights and coffee talk. But the corona virus has definitely put a damper on social events and things here. I'm bummed because now is the time I normally go to my cousin's soccer game she coaches. All games have been cancelled until further notice. I remember with swine flu she had trouble getting other teams to play her and kids shaking hands was a big deal. This is much worse cuz I don't remember whole sporting events being cancelled. Oh well. I just hope all this hand washing pays off in the end and we live through all this. 

Stay safe ya'll and I love ya. *HUGS & LICKS*

 

[hirondelle]

10 hours ago, Tika said:

I forgot until I got here how much I miss this place when I don't come around.

We're doing ok here, I'm on the opposite end of the work from home scale.   We haven't had any cases in the town I live in yet but it's coming and probably soon and the small hospital I work at could easily get overwhelmed.  My town is mostly shut down, no schools, no restaurants or bars open, most businesses closed, limited hours at grocery stores etc.  I'm isolating as much as I can but the odds of me getting exposed at work are pretty high no matter how careful I am.

*hugs Tika* you can hope they get it under control before it gets to you but yeah hope for the best but prepare for the worst as they say

[hirondelle]

9 hours ago, Moonhawk said:

Checking in, having the kids out of school  has helped with time with them. My agoraphobia and anxiety rear their heads more frequently since the outbreak, however still going to work. Having your own business and employees who depend on you is hard. My Filipino teams is on lockdown so most are working from home. However not the same for my Miami team yet. I fear the worse is yet to come after speaking to two friends who work in government. Hope all are safe

Thanks for checking in Sweet Hawk. The anxiety is kicking my ass too, glad I already went to the docs and got some pharmaceutical support before this all kicked off. Prior to the virus I was having anxiety for other reasons.. Now it's just all piling up. Glad you are still working and able to keep work for your people. Many aren't so fortunate. 

[Timberwolf]

On 3/16/2020 at 6:34 PM, Deano said:

Here in London, things are getting a little serious. in my area there are many confirmed cases and throughout the UK there a thousands. I trust wolves friends and family members are well.

Hey @Deano.  Things are starting to get serious here as well.  The government today has asked that people go out as little as possible.  Less than a week ago, they asked that all entertainment venues close, so pubs, bars, movie theaters, massage parlors () were to close.  Pubs and bars could get around it by saying they are restaurants if they served food though.

[Timberwolf]

On 3/16/2020 at 10:14 PM, fox said:

Indeedy!

I was slated to go to South Carolina (SC) for a very good friend's wedding - I'd been planning to attend for over a year. I'd be lying if I said I didn't almost cancel a few days before. We'll get to the mental effects of that in a moment or two.

So I left last Wednesday - great, smooth trip. Great hugs. Great late night sushi dinner. It was going outstandingly. Then Thursday happened. It was a lovely morning, fun pre-wedding US Costco shopping trip (which was lined up to the back of the store as I expect things looked in The Walking Dead before shit got really real). Then news started to trickle in and my anxiety started to tighten my shoulders. Trump started flapping gum, then Canada reacted. I had a fun night Thursday, alternating between friendly visiting and sobbing - I cried myself to sleep that night, tbh. So. I chatted with my mom Friday morning and when I came out of that conversation in tears, my beautiful bride friend asked if I needed to go to the airport. It was the "permission" I needed - I booked a last minute flight and had another smooth travel day (well, with a 10h stay in the Vancouver airport overnight, but I was back in BC and I knew I could handle anything as long as I was back in BC).

So. I'm home. Because I crossed boarders, I'm meant to self-quarantine for 14-days. I am newly, differently thankful that I am separated (almost divorced actually, which is a different story for a different thread and day) from my ex and our children are with him. He is a wonderful, devoted father and they are fine. But. I don't get to see my boys until almost April, now. And I fucking KNEW that I shouldn't leave. I'm trying not to beat myself up, because I actually didn't/couldn't have known. Things ramped alarmingly after I was already in the US. When I left, there was no travel warning in place, and no warnings to quarantine, or even socially distance. It was business as usual, but wash your hands and don't like doorknobs. All the same, I'm beating myself up. This is a safe space, and I don't need coddling - I know my bran is inclined to get into Depression Mode pretty quickly and I have some rational thoughts helping right now - but FUCK do I feel selfish and like a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad momma.

I'm trying to keep busy. I'll be working from home for at least the next two weeks, and when I don't have emails to reply to, I'll be organizing and cleaning my house, working on a budget project, baking (I stress bake), and walking the mutt as often as I can (no gym time for this fox - send me your best workout videos please and tyvm).

I chuckled at the ogre comment, btw. My first in line is looking out for me in a strange, beautiful way. It's amusing. I love him.

And hey? I fucking love you, @hirondelle. You will always be so important to me. However life ebbs and flows, you are always my person.

Ugh. I fucking hate this. It's bullshit. I'm also worried about people. I'm self-quarantining because I cannot be the cause of my children getting sick - I would rather not see them for this whole awful ride than risk that no matter how healthy and strong all of our bodies are. (Please note: I do not have symptoms. I just interacted with too many people in an international sense and Canada, BC in particular, asks that I solo a few weeks.) I hate seeing the news of deaths. I know that immunocompromised people are massively susceptible right now. Those are people, though. They're individuals with rich histories and people who love them. And they're dying. From this bullshit flu. This isn't the way this should be going. And people are getting manic. Manic people are stocking up on firearms and ammunition (and tp, yeah yeah). I'm worried that COVID-19 is only one concern during this time.  

People we know will get sick. People we know may die from this. 

And then there are social implications. On an academic level, the studies in the next 6-24 months will be fucking fascinating. Living it may be dicey, though.

Bah. Thank you for this thread, and this place. I know it's quiet here, but I check it often, too. I don't always post, because I don't always have a lot to say. But I will always love it.

Hey @fox, I heard that you were quarantining.  I'm sending you strength.  

[Timberwolf]

On 3/18/2020 at 1:55 PM, Clarissa said:

Big hugs to you all. It's a very scary and uncertain time for us all. It's been crazy here for awhile, bushfires,  then floods and now this. 

big huggles to you also.  I hope you're staying safe and healthy!

[Timberwolf]

On 3/20/2020 at 4:19 AM, icewlf said:

I'm going insane after just 3 days of mandatory telework.  I'm very introverted, but have had a lack of meaningful social contact for so long, than now....i NEEEEEED contact.....physical contact, and I'm not allowed to have it for the forseable future    Plus, no pretty women smile at me when i'm at home.   Gonna be a rough month or two =P

 

Oh, telework has to suck.  I'm so sorry @icewlf.  I know what you mean about needing physical contact.  I'm lucky in the fact that I have @hirondellehere with me.

[Timberwolf]

On 3/20/2020 at 10:16 AM, Forest Mage said:

This just added more to the living hell I've been going through.   I lost enough family already,  I don't need to lose more cause of the damn virus.   I keep praying my heart out that my family keeps staying healthy during this time.     

 

Sending healthy vibes and prays to all of my Northlands family. 

huggles @Forest Mage

We are here for you Forest Mage and sending you love.