Kethlia

Butterfly

*Walks in with light pitter patters and sits back on my squirrelly hunches. I admire you and give you a slight bow with a small smile on my lips as my form changes to human.* For my NL family who witnessed my losses through my blog whether in silence or through shown support. I am happy to announce that my third child has been safely born and is being lovingly cared for by myself and my husband as I write this. I thank you for your words and supportive silence through these years.

Tsunami

https://youtu.be/Gmj35nYi7mY *Pitch black night, a void that's darker deep inside. A rift that time, love, and family has torn countless time. A rift in me that becomes its own void of oblivion. Nothingness, that keeps it's own council.* *A step that ripples the darkness, my foot touches down in the midst of my emotions. Tumbling through pain, fear, and wish to be free of it all. Another step I move forward? A ripple that crashes into the others without blending, bending, or breaking.* Where am I? What have I become in the midst of this pain and biding my time to wait? *My body is power, strength, and grace. Yet, my mind is unsteady, my words the only thing that gives it an anchor to reality. More ripples, my steps increase, a pulse of light from within me. It has never flickered even in the midst of my despair and self-loathing.* Why was I granted this life, time and again, why do I survive after those held most precious? What gave me the right to stand here in the darkness looking at this abyss made manifest by my Will. *Nothing else exists in this place, but myself and it. Raising my hands my favored weapons of choice spill out of them, my words. Sparks of light against the darkness, some colored by the emotion they portray. Disgust fills me as I look at the stark contrast between the Words that I say and the Darkness inside.* Do I have the right? Tears pour freely as the pain returns the numbness of reality releasing torrents of emotions. *My knees cause waves to radiate from me that grow with the depth of rage that is also building.* Can anger and depression exist simultaneously? Can they burn and freeze a person and leave them unable to breathe? I fight, my body wills my lungs to breathe, but all I do is cry out in voiceless scream of agony. Pain searing me in flashes that nearly pierce the light of my steadfast soul. My mind shrieks into the hollow void inside as my body bends into itself, convulsing on this empty surface. What right do I have to call this pain, trauma, or ignorant projection? Yet, I've forced myself to perfectly master hiding my true feelings. *Gasping, coarse breath that burns from the prolonged suffocation.* Time has passed, and my limbs have become heavy from lack of blood, but they fill up greedily with each breath. Pins and needles run the course of my body, making it unbearable to move, because I am still, Alive. Looking above, at nothing, looking within at nothing. I see the light mirrored in a blinding sun above, hollering I cover my eyes. What I have given, none may take away. You are mine, you are accepted unconditionally. You are loved unconditionally. Words, that aren't my own fill me, leaving me weak and shuddering at the power hidden within the universe. It cares not what, who, why, or how you are, nor when you'll be at your best. It accepts. I look at the Light above through the light of my soul. Deep within the pain, hate, and anger have started to ease. I didn't ask, I never pleaded, yet the is healing already starting within me. It doesn't erase the void or darkness because it's a part of those. I kept spectating as the emotions right themselves, the wounds scarred over, and the words became empowered. Within the darkness, there is the dimmest of possibilities offered to me. Yet, it will take a strength of Will and courage I have not felt to surmount myself. There are other beacons of light within this darkness now, having gone through this trial alone. I can see them if I focus, but they too have to pass through the abyss and come out the other side. I shout with all that I am, I Will It! Freely Given! Freely Taken! I want it! I need it! I am!

I would love to read it, when you do. Will it be in the writer's thread or a blog?

*Smirks and enters with mischief in my violet eyes and wickedness in my smile. Pausing to bow to my beloves and beloveds.* I pray you are well, my dear family. I have to see if my hollowed home as its roots spread into the Discord App, as I've begun writing again and miss the general camaraderie of my NL family near and far. I am currently a part of Promise of Lingyun Clan Serverx2 but know that I would love to test my written skills against my NL family if they wished to join me there in an NL Server of our own. *Laughs* I am also using another persona name on Discord, Zan Heng-zanheng if you're looking for me on Discord. Let me know who you are as I'm still screening and absolutely wary of Internet horrors and Murphy's Law could be-s. *Winks* For a male-based persona who hasn't given his RL info away in the game and in those servers except to a select few. I've been enjoying seeing the reactions and stories around him. Though, *Wicked Smile* my appetite stays the same in certain prose or poetic pieces. I'm learning how to adapt the character through continued interactions with others. ^One of my A.I. generated art ideas for Zandt Urgos a Mafia variant of Zan Heng the Ancient Chinese Physician. V

https://play.aidungeon.io/main/worldStart?worldPublicId=ca6d0945-9aaa-44a3-90b4-6981f8c2eca9 So, to really start this writing topic off. I've post a link to a world that I threw together and have used the ai program. I've learned to use Story replies to keep dialog, setting and improved ai generated text that follows the storyline. You can use Do, Say, See, but I find myself editing the responses more.

audio books; nova terra series by seth ring and eternal online by tj reynolds.

Oooo, I likey!

I've been using AiDungeon to generate stories for a world I created on the spot to test the Ai responses. So far, its been fun editing its responses to fit my views. I also leave additions that create a spin to my story. I have needed to fight to keep my "player" as the story's pov otherwise it puts my responses into a new character. I've also thought about its use with blogs, chapter fillers and possibly helping me correct my bad writing habits. What are your thoughts and opinions?

I'm wishing you the best! It's been humbling following your progress and dedication.

My body feels the cold of death and smells its decaying breath as I use my left foot to step from my street into my doorway. This place isn't my living room. I gaze around and see rows of bookcases and tomes that disappear into the shadows. I look down and there are also scrolls and sheafs of paper strewn about in some fashion of order that escapes my intellect. I place my right foot down on the hardwood floor without a mote of dust being disturbed. The glow of a light source behind something ahead ebbs and wanes ahead of me. I walk forward with caution. I don't want to piss off the library, aides and owner, by damage the items around me. I step around a particularly large stack of volumes that tilts at an odd angle, holding my breath. I gasp and suck in my breath so involuntarily that I end up coughing behind a fist. I don't know what is going on before me, but the tale and the storyteller have me enraptured by their intonation. My mind has gone on leave and left me in a Library guarded by Death himself! Oh, come on! "Welcome to the dark library. We specialize in dark, forbidden knowledge... You know, all the naughty stuff mortals shouldn't know. Please take your time to browse our ancient books, but beware.... All knowledge has a price." My body begins to shiver at the warning and invite. I didn't have plans to visit such a place tonight. Just me, my bed and some random videos online before sleeping like a log. I take a step back, bumping into books, remembering the tower that I had stepped around and turning to keep it steady. I breath in the dust and paper smell of an old library using my breath to calm down my accelerated heartbeat. I look back the way I had come and see that the door to my place no longer exists. Damn it! What entity of heaven or hell did I piss off to get here?! I think about anything that I could've touched or encountered that would lead to a realm jump like this. Though I guess if I'm thinking straight, it's more accurate to say that this is a crossing of thresholds that.... Shit! I had picked up a book that was someone's idea of self-help for the perpetually susceptible person. I had laughed at the book wondering how it even got through the editorial staff much less the publishing company. Note to self, no more picking up stray books like stray pets and taking them home! My body goes rigid as the darkness becomes more than shadows and starts to suck from my vitality. Permission to drain me was not granted! Back off! My mind screams as one liquified horror of the senses runs through my minds after each other. I shift my attention back to the Deathly Librarian and wonder what price my ignorance is about to make me pay.

What is your opinion on this version of Wednesday? I honestly love the original live action series, but I've never read the original comics and so I have come to appreciate the darker portrayal. But, then that's just the sadomasopessimist talking.

"He gestures grandly with is arm..." Is this supposed to be his, or its? "With his steel tongs Aserog placed this box inside the crucible that was meant to hold the nine sacred artifacts." Crucible? The imagery I'm coming up with is a cement or high temp resistance cylinder that usually holds molten metal. Or a metal box with a mouth that is rimmed like a thick lipped clay pot. “Now look at you. Wasting your existence here limbo. 'in' is missing. "With his other hand he summoned the crucible and placed each box inside it’s mold in the crucible without touching anything." Now I see a cylinder of a pot made out of putty to fit the shape of each box like a silicon dice mold. "His black scaly skin was the texture of a decaying corpse" I am having trouble here between the image and feel of a reptile and a corpse. Are they the tough scales of a snake interspersed with rotting wounds, or as soft as a lizard's hide? The Librarian opens the book again to the next chapter. “Now is the time to begin their stories. Perhaps you will discover how to Create your Paradise without destroying your soul. Learn where these other men and women went wrong. Find your power within these pages written so very long ago.” Now, this is a crux, will you be managing and replying to all who reply with their own sacrifice to your library or books or is there a single path taken at a time? I figure it will either be a writing free for all or a turn based one to give amply time for replying. Since, Life is busy, and Death can wait.

*I did find a way to purchase books on my phone. Thanks lovely! I just finished re-reading Magic Bytes by Ilona Andrews

Good morning to those who are awake during my night. May your day be blessed and filled with love.

Christmas, a day of religious to some. To others is about gifts and family get togethers. To the world it is another day of beliefs from a different viewpoint, mindset and dogma. I wonder how my hubby and I will pass the day, work, play, ignorance is bliss? I what I raised as, what my hubby believes, what another family holiday without our sons means. For now, I am okay. He is okay. We are okay. However, it will remind us yet again of our loss. The only comfort if we care to take comfort in it, is the thought that at least our boys aren't suffering. They're out there causing mischief and mayhem like their mother with the innocence of their father's good nature. Novas, worm holes, creating nebulas and scattering meteoroid fields. Who knows maybe even looking up proverbial skirts, togas, etc. They are my sons after all, heh heh. I hope the winter falls softly and without bite for my northern NL family. May those in the tropical climes enjoy star filled nights and temperate weather. I close my eyes and draw a breath in, a breath of cool crisp air. A chill that runs across my body and raises goosebumps over my flesh. A brilliant white sun over white snow. The crunch of my steps as I shift in the cold. The sway hiss of pine needles whose scent fills the lightest breeze. The crackle and rustle of twigs on the ground and on the barren trees. A cloud that passes in front of the sun, muting its glorious rays to a soft cream. Clothed in warm clothes and breathing out a warm cloud of breath into the air. This stillness calms me, settles my feelings, and releases the negativities into the arms of winter. I hold the vision of your opalescent souls within my mind, my heart, and my soul. Beloved Sons of ours. We love you. We miss you being in our lives. The days are dull even as we do our best to live. We smile, we laugh and we play pranks on each other. Yet, in the stillness of our minds away from society and life's continual stroll, we miss you, our babies. The sanctuary of our hearts is each other especially in our grieving. We hope for another day to grow stronger and precious moments that give life its true meaning. Dearest lights within the sky of our souls guide us to where our sons await our reunion with patience and ready eagerness to hear the stories of our adventure called Life. We await our reunion and keep stepping forward into new and old horizons. Just bear with us when we have let our tears of saddness fall. Missing you and not having you here physically takes a toll on us more than can be 'suck it up' or 'give it time' its a welcome release of our true loving feelings that have no where to go. We love you. We miss you. We'll be with you when our life ends naturally. It will just be a long, narrow, rocky stumbling road is all. One step at a time and we'll get to our next moment of bracing strength.

Thanksgiving has come and gone this year of 2022. I remember the laughter, songs, jokes and the joy of gathering together. The quiet of the evening give way to the night. That is when the pain returns, small things appear in flashes of memory, touch, and sounds. The grief is still there hidden in the background. Yet, I know that I must not follow this path into a sad, isolated, loneliness. My family, friends, my life itself are proof of Life continuing. I do not want to tie the precious memories of my sons to this universe by missing them too much. Missing them too much to think, feel, do and react with vitality. We do not deserve that, not in this life or the next. So, instead I busy myself with flower arranging with my sons' grandmother, my mother. Shifting, snipping and cutting them until the flowers, greenery and spaces between fit the center piece needs. There is a quiet joy that even if I cry from missing my boys, I can still move through the day finish my tasks. Happiness is being together on any day that we can come together and just be ourselves. "As the wind blows through the trees. And the leaves are falling down. Can you feel the fire light, warm the time of autumn." "Cloud filled skies, before more my eyes. Cooling tears and flowing waters." "Can you hear my heartfelt song? Hear the thrum of my drum. Sitting beside still waters." "Look up high, in the night sky. A sign of clearing weather. Come sit beside this fire of mine. We'll break our bread and drink deeply of our water."

Moon

Innocent

I'll give it a try through my laptop internet. I keep getting sent back to the purchase options when I use my mobile web.

Webtoon comics. It sucks that I can't enjoy the unlimited kindle books now that you can't purchase them on mobile app, and mobile internet through the amazon store.?

Drift away a netflixs original animation