fox

Because we're going to have another Conversation tonight. Joy. Bliss. More of the same bullshit that will get us exactly nowhere. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay....

The State of Affairs by Esther Perel

Oooh. @Spyder. Damn. Well done. Thank you for sharing this. When this is done, I will go back to Glass Animals - Pork Soda

Green tea. I have been drinking a lot of green tea lately.

Memories. And healing, because FUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHCK. And thinking and feeling like I'm doing it wrong ALL THE DAMN TIME. And feeling like I'm crazy - I feel like I"m crazy most of my (personal life) day. It has to smooth out. One of these days, it has to smooth out....

Making (stupid) mistakes. Healing is fucking hard. And messy. Dammit.

I ate a cookie and I have guilt. That this is a very real problem in my brain is a very real problem. It's a goddamn cookie. First of all, unhealthy relationship with my body, it's going to do exactly nothing - I work out, I eat well, I'm doing just fine. Second of all, my relationship with my body is sad. It's a great body. It's done amazing things. These disrespectful thoughts just really need to stop. IT'S A GODDAMN COOKIE. Eat the cookie, Kim. ENJOY THE FUCKING COOKIE. Honour the cookie. My brain sucks.

Coffee. YASSSSSSSS! Love. Yes. I am quitting teh liquor. Not because I drink too much, I don't. Buuuuuuuut...all teh sugarz. (Re-setting on that. I got back into emotional eating hard recently. I need to take a step back and figure that out.)

Oh cool! Is it an online institution, or an online program, @Dulcet? Brick and mortar. UNBC: https://www.unbc.ca/ (My undergrad alma mater.)

I know @Dulcet was a student and maybe is again - yes? How's that going, Dulcet? Anyone else? Who's taking classes? My eldest is now in regular school, which is daunting and weird and lovely and beautiful and exciting and pride-inspiring. And I'm taking a class again this semester, a 400-level Social Work class with MAYBE designs on applying for grad school in the next 50 years or so. Talk to me about school. I love school. I work as a student advisor (now) in post-secondary and it's goddamn dreamy. I WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON.

Vodka and blueberry lemonade. w3wt.

Just life. I'm just really tired. (Not OF life. Just tired. I'm okay. Mostly good. But still sad. And tired. And just...feeling like I'm on the edge of something and I have no idea what it is, or whether it's good or awful.)

Finishing corvid tattoo (#1) in less than a month.

Like Father

That universe. Bring it. Alt-universe Kim sounds like she has more free time. Which usually means baking. So....

Okay. But. We may have to have a discussion about proper caesar salad dressing now. Because that right there? That is best with anchovies.

This.

Howzit?

So very much always.

@Spyder Hi. xo

Good mood. (First time in a long time. Just a really good mood. ...for no good reason. MAYBE because bubble-gum pink nails. MAYBE because of sushi plans. EITHER WAY, it was nice to be happy.) Bought myself rocks. For talisman necklaces. (Malachite, amethyst, and tree agate.)

SUPER cool! Congratulations Dulcet - that's outstanding. And grad school! BALLER. (University is my every day (professional) life. Education makes me happy. )

Recently got back into liquor. Because life, y0. I usually alternate between cider, wine, rye, and vodka. Tonight: (Sid) vodka and lemonade. Good times. Who am I drinking with, and what's your poison? (I'm careful and not into serious drinking. It's just been a long time since I've been interested in alcohol - largely because of pregnancy, nursing, trying to get pregnant, more pregnancy, and more nursing. Now that story is over and life has been...life-y.)

While this makes me sad.... Being at home with just him - while he's recovering and actually doing really well right now - is beautiful. He's lovely company. (Largely because I'm not feeling quite SO bad for him because he's presenting as much better than he was at 0300h.)

Sick toddler.